EP36 – Purpose Fuels Passion

Matthew J. Brownstein hosts Anna Grabow in this special episode of Illuminated Mind®. Anna Grabow is a speaker and business mentor focused on changing the way others view the world. She hosts The Premise of Purpose Podcast, a show where entrepreneurs and other leaders are interviewed on how they found their purpose and continue to live it every day. She also leads 1:1 and group coaching for aspiring entrepreneurs who want to find their power and make a difference in the world.

Welcome, everyone to the illuminated mind podcast. My name is Matthew Brownstein, founder of the Institute of interpersonal hypnotherapy and the lead instructor there. I’m here with Annika bow. So welcome to the eliminated mind podcast.
Thank you for having me.
So glad you’re here. Glad to be on your podcast, it was very enjoyable. And let me tell our audience about you. And then we’ll dive into some really cool topics. Annika bow is a speaker and business mentor focused on changing the way others use the world. She used to believe that the world was out to get her. But through divine life experiences came to realize that life is not what we thought. It is actually all created out of love. She hosts the premise of purpose podcast, a show where entrepreneurs and other leaders are interviewed on how they found their purpose, and continue to live it every day. She also leads one to one and group coaching for aspiring entrepreneurs who want to find their power and make a difference in the world. And it believes that everyone has their own unique magic that originates from them. And she is on a mission to help others discover that within themselves. So we’re gonna dive right into the theme of purpose. That’s why I was interested in your podcast because I teach through our school, a Life Mastery Course, which is all about living a self actualized life. You mentioned the theme of in your bio, their divine life experiences that happened before we go into the real nitty gritty of purpose, when you talk to us about you, and perhaps some of those experiences. So who’s Annika bow? And what are those deeper experiences that motivate all this?
Absolutely. I love this question. So who I am, when I was younger, I was very interested in the arts. So that’s where I started. And I was a professional ballet dancer when I was 17. I moved to New York City and I did all of that. But I wasn’t really happy anymore. Because the more I danced, the more I realized I’m in a room by myself staring at the mirror. And I’m not interacting with people. So I had sort of a life crisis around 20 and decided that I had to help people, whatever that meant, I just couldn’t dance anymore. So I put dance. And I moved back home to Los Angeles and just started listening to speakers on the internet, because it really motivated me and inspired me. And I started working in the medical field, I worked on an ambulance as an emergency medical technician. And I just wanted to be in there, relating with people and helping them. And so from there, I started working with special needs kids. And I was really just in the you know, in the throes of all of the things that are worldly suffering, really. So it was in there. And I knew that I wanted to start coaching in whatever way I could, because when I was with the patients, you know, I could treat whatever they were going through. But I couldn’t go deeper than that. And so I never felt fulfilled after every patient interaction. So I knew I had to go deeper. Now, when we’re talking about divine life experiences, these were happening the whole time without me being aware of it until later when I was able to look back. So one very big divine life experience was that in 2021, which was just last year, I actually met my teacher or my mentor, who lives in India. And her guru, her teacher had told her about me and where to find me. And what’s very interesting is when I was 16 years old, I went to a temple in Los Angeles, it was built by an Indian man, I had no idea. But a friend took me and I sat and I did my first ever meditation. And sure enough, an image of my teachers guru was in that temple when I had my first meditation. So there were all these little things where I felt this is so strange that I would have these interactions where it felt like it was predestined or planned. And then these people met me. And then they know me better than I know myself, and they want to teach me things. So the more that I just opened up to that, and I started looking at things that made more sense to me than just the reality that we know, I started learning that, you know, life is a lot more than we can just explain or that most people think. And that there are these really divine structures in place that allow us to do something bigger than what we think
is beautiful. Thank you for sharing that. And yes, I’m spending time in India, myself and connecting to those traditions, I can really appreciate where you’re coming from. So talk to me about purpose. That’s a big part of your life’s work. How would we define purpose? Why is it so important? What’s the overview?
Yes, so I would define purpose as your mission in this lifetime on this planet. So everyone has something that’s pulling them in drawing them every day and I feel that a lot of people They’re trying to find it, but they maybe are using logic from around them to try and figure it out. And so they might not be feeling as on purpose as they could, because they might not be looking inwardly for those answers. So to me purpose means really discovering what sets your soul on fire, what makes you come alive, what allows you to be your fullest self here, right without trying to make ourselves fit into any sort of box. So to me purpose is being your true self fully, and bringing that magic into the world. And then why I love to focus on this is because I’m realizing that every person is so different, right? Some people, they might have certain patterns or habits or, you know, if you believe in reincarnation, they might have lived on a certain planet many more times than other people. So they have different, you know, qualities and things that they’ve learned. And so everyone must then have something very important to bring to the world that only they have learned and experienced. So I’m just very fascinated by this idea that everyone is so different, yet we’re the same. And so helping them really blossom into that part of themselves.
Yeah, nice. And I heard you saying, mission and purpose, kind of the terms are synonymous in that way. Also, that you said, if you’re using more logic, you might not be able to figure this out. But that it’s more about feeling. And it’s more about turning within. So can you elaborate on your experience? Or what you teach others? On? What is that how I’m someone who is very clear about my purpose and mission. And I think life would be horrendous. Like, I don’t want to you want to use a strong word i It’s not like it would be inconvenient or uncomfortable. It would be pure suffering to be on a planet spinning in the middle of nowhere, not knowing where it came from not knowing where I’m going, not really even knowing who I am this like whole amnesia victim and not knowing what to do with myself. So how do we find something so valuable for those who have not tapped into that yet?
This is so important. Yes. So for me, the thing that really woke me up was actually breathwork, that was breathing in a certain pattern to a point where all the oxygen went from my prefrontal cortex into my subconscious mind. And all of a sudden, I wasn’t myself anymore. I wasn’t my ego self. And I was breathing for an hour. And I just started experiencing what it felt like to be myself without being who I thought I was. And, you know, I was able to take that sort of experience into deeper meditations, because I’ve always meditated. And it’s very peaceful, if you’re doing it for the first few times, and it may be feels good. But then once you really get to a certain level where you forget yourself, and you just get to exist, that’s when you really start remembering who you really are. And so I love how you spoke about amnesia. That really is how it feels when you come here. And you know, when I came into this world, I struggled a lot with depression and anxiety. I remember being four years old and wanting to die, I was ready, I wanted out. I did not want this world. And so for me, it was, I just had this feeling that if I’m in this world, there must be a reason. Because why could I be in this world of suffering if there wasn’t a purpose to it. And so that was really the thing that was driving me as I was growing up, because it was so painful for me in this world. I really love all things light and bright and peaceful and positive. And that’s where I’m the most comfortable. And so it was really just this process of finding it. But for anyone who wants to experience this remembrance, just taking time to, you know, steal your mind, and try and go into as deep a trance as possible. You might just feel differently than you did before.
All right, suddenly play the role of somebody who’s really new at this whole thing. I have to breathe like that for an hour, I have to go into a trance. So I’m like you said, like when you meditate, maybe it’s peaceful at first, but then you start noticing, oh, I’ve got issues. So we teach breathwork at the school, I’ve been doing rebirthing now for over 25 years. So I’m very familiar with the process. And I know it could actually be gut wrenching, it can be extremely challenging. Because what seems to be in between us and our dharma, our purpose and mission are a lot of mental emotional blocks. So yeah, can you elaborate on that from your experience that it is it always just easy I find my purpose and now making lots of money and helping lots of people? Or do I have to work in my own inner demons to get to that place?
Yes, great question. And you absolutely do have to work through your own inner demons. But I also find that the minute I start acknowledging those demons and working through them that already I start to feel better because it’s kind Like trying to ignore an elephant in the room, when you’re trying to do things without looking at these painful blocks, there’s a lot of pressure on you all the time. But at least if you’re aware of it, and you’re looking at it head on, then you can experience the pain of it. But at least there’s truth in it. You know, like, if someone’s in a horrible relationship, they can pretend that everything’s okay. And then if they really address it, it might be painful, but at least you now are finally seeing things the way they are. So when I did breathwork, the first few times, you know, there were a lot of different experiences, one of which, that was not so comfortable was that I started getting very tight, and I would start crying out of nowhere, right, or coughing, just this very strange experience. But I also felt like whatever pains and anxieties were in my body, that they were kind of coming up to the surface. So even though it was very uncomfortable, I just sort of had this knowing that everything was okay, if I allowed it. And I just sort of stayed with it a little longer. So for anyone who experiences how uncomfortable it is to start looking at yourself, just remembering that if you continue through it, you will get to the other side. So just be patient, you know,
yeah, I always say it’s worth the price of admission, because you don’t know and you’re on one side of the jungle, you’re trying to get to the other and others have gone through and they seem to be the place you want to be. You said, Oh, I just want to be like the Buddha. You know, I just want to be like the saints of India. But then I want to be doing my purpose, I want to have a mission, I want to feel like my life is valuable. But the price of admission is really your own ego, right? To clear those layers and those blocks. Could you say there’s any way to get there without having to go through all that?
Well, I guess it depends on if someone has already done a lot of this work before before right now, because I believe that you really cannot refined yourself unless you are 100% committed to it. And that means giving up anything that is standing in your way. So someone might be incredibly ready at this moment. And all they have to do is make a decision and commit. And for someone else, there might be a lot of steps in the way before they can get there. So it might look different for every person. But as long as you are 100% committed to knowing what your destination is, you can accomplish it in whatever way you want.
It nice, good we’re on the same page. I am do people start in different places. So you teach this in groups and with clients. I would think people who want to know, I need to know my mission. I want to know my mission there if you’re hearing this interview if you’ve stumbled across your work, but they really don’t know what that purpose is yet. Do you have a system? Is there a way without having to just do all this breath work and cry Almighty there’s is there like a joyful, peaceful way? Maybe with some inner work? Obviously, we both agree that’s required. But what’s the system? Is there a method that you teach?
Yeah, absolutely. Well, this method I’m using with people more one on one. So it’s being developed into a bigger system. But what I would say the main thing is, is just to allow people a place to reflect on themselves and on their lives. Because before you can jump into all of the more difficult things, you know, it’s easier to learn how to swim a little bit on the side before you jump into the water. So giving them a space to really start talking about the things that they’re feeling all the time. A lot of people try and you know, not think about bigger feelings because they want to do well in the world. And they don’t want to come unraveled. And so they’re just trying to do their best all the time. But if you give someone a space to really speak what’s on their mind and express what they’re feeling, then they can start to release some of that pressure. And get clear maybe without doing all the breath work on what they really do care about. Right?
So you do one on one work now. So if I were trying to figure out my purpose, we would be talking you would just be guiding me through my own feelings again, it sounds like a kinesthetic a feeling process that I’m not going to intellectually come to you as a was like the the guidance counselor’s but the people in school like when you’re high school, and they’re trying to help you to figure out what you’re gonna be when you grow up. It seems like a very intellectual process. So this is more of an internal you’re guiding people inwards. It’s a feeling process. How do you know when you get it? When have you have you had clients? Maybe you could tell us a client experience where like there was an aha moment and somebody who felt amnesia last didn’t know what to do is now I know I have to go start my own ice cream shop or something like a ha moment. And yeah, what happens internally?
Absolutely. Well, there was this one client who had a really well actually all but I will tell you my favorite part about when they have their aha moments because they all look the same in a certain way. After we’ve had a session. They’re looking at me with different eyes, and all of a sudden I realize I’m not looking at the same person. I was an hour hour ago. And instead of having all of these questions to ask and things to say, the person is very quiet, and very calm, and they seem to just understand things without needing to ask. And so that’s when I know that there’s been some sort of movement. Because when you do feel connected to yourself like that there is a certain level of understanding and knowing and calmness about what you’re meant to do. And I will say, that’s one of my favorite things I, you know, I have people that come in, they’re crying, and they’re sad, of course, about work and relationships and all these things. And then after some time together, you know, you just see that there’s this peace inside of them. And that’s one of the most wonderful things that I could experience because I know that they’re changed internally that they’re connected.
Now. So it’s not necessarily maybe there’s a times but it’s not like this overwhelming joy or running out lights. It’s a calm, it’s a piece of certainty of knowing and you find that to be sounds like universal. Yes, yes. Right. Because when we were talking a bit before, we said, Let’s go really deep, like, Where does purpose come from? And you know, is it just that you intellectually figure it out? Obviously, we’ve said, you know, it’s not that, but it’s maybe not just an based on what you just said, it’s not an emotional knowing either. It’s deeper than that is when talk about peace, you’re talking about, like a state of being a core state of being that is universal. So where does purpose come from? In your understanding?
Yes, that’s a great question. I feel like I’m still uncovering more about this every day. But for my understanding, there’s a certain level of purpose that we have chosen something that we want to do or bring or learn or understand. And I feel that another piece of it is that there are so many different aspects to purpose, that there’s also a greater purpose. So each person has a purpose, than there’s a greater purpose. So we’re all individual puzzle pieces with our purpose that also fits into a bigger picture for the world, right. And all of this stems from love and goodness, and bringing a higher energy into everything that is. So if you feel like you are bringing higher energy and love into your world, then you’re doing a part of it. And collectively, we can all do it together. But that’s part of what’s going on, I
believe. Nice. So when there’s this feeling the connection to love, peace, goodness, you know, you’re on the right track. And there’s like a certainty that comes from having tapped in to that. It’s might sound naive, but I want to say you guys were going through like the why purpose, what purpose? How do you find your purpose? who establishes your purpose? Oh,
yeah, good question. Well, I feel like there are lots of people, we’d love to ask to get confirmation for everyone. But I believe that we definitely are part of establishing that purpose that we 100% want to accomplish something specific. And so we want to do that. And I also believe that there is, you know, something intangible something all encompassing. You know, you can call it source or you know, cosmic beings or energies. But I believe that we, along with this greater intelligence, choose what’s meant to happen.
Hmm, no, it’s so it’s, it’s a choice. And at the same time, maybe it’s not really a choice. It’s kind of like I like say, you walk into a movie theater, the seats on the left hand, needles in them, the seats on the right are super comfy. Is it really a choice? Right? Like, is it like fear and love? You say, Oh, that’s a choice or ego and spirit, that’s a choice. But is it really a choice once you realize how insane it is to sit in the uncomfortable cushions or to choose your ego fear based mind, or just to be living out of fear? Self it is like aligning to love to goodness to peace to and he didn’t use the word God respectfully good. But but we’re gonna we’re talking about that thing. People tend to call God, some source, some Universal Intelligence. And that that has a bigger plan. If you want to call it a plan, it has a bigger purpose. And were part of that. Yes, yes. And it’s a choice really just to align with reality. Sense. Right, rather than just to live in, I don’t know, our delusions and our make believe about what we’re not. So yeah, it sounds like aligning to who you truly are as a being of peace and love and goodness. And knowing that the source of that is guiding you if you’re just willing to listen, does that sound like?
Definitely, definitely. And when we talk about choice in this, you know, I love the analogy of the movie theater seats, someone could choose to stand at the back of the theater and not come out yet and sort of, you know, not commit to sitting in the love filled seats, right. And so, I feel that you know, actually Using those love filled seats is our higher choice as well, because we are part of this god essence, if you will. So it almost is what we originally intended. And we’re a piece of that, too. So there are many layers to this, I believe, but then we do have the ability to make choices throughout the day, of course, you know, someone could choose to respond a certain way or a worse way. So even though we have chosen things, we also get to choose within that how we’re going to play this all out.
Right? There’s certainly a lot of our choice whether we’re going to stand in the back, or where do we move into it? So if we want to go deeper into it, you said like, we explore like meditation themes. So what would someone do if they said, I don’t know what trans is, and I don’t want to do all that breathwork I’m gonna go through my emotions. But I’m thinking about meditation as a way to turn within. What What can you say about that, like styles of meditation reasons to do it?
Yeah, absolutely. Well, it was first introduced to me, like I said, I tried it once just to experience it with a friend. And then after that, it started just being introduced for mental health reasons. So a lot of professionals would say, oh, there’s this really great thing called meditation, it helps a lot with depression and anxiety. And so the first class I went to it went to four, it was just a group of people. And we started by just talking about the brain and how it works, where there was, you know, sort of the reptilian brain, and you know, the part that kicks in when you’re hungry or afraid. And then there’s other parts with reasoning. So at first, I just started understanding that, you know, the brain doesn’t just think, and it’s not just on, but there’s also reasons why we have certain reactions that may be more fear based, or stress based, and things like that. And so if someone really just wants to start, honestly, I might even just journal for a little bit and just start writing out some of the things you’re thinking, because before you’re ready to try and quiet the mind, there’s probably a lot of things going on in the background, that should actually be looked at, right, because we don’t want to just push it all away. So if you haven’t really meditated, I would sit and I would just write out pages of anything that’s on your mind, that’s just been mulling around in there. And then once you feel like there is a place of quiet or stillness, like maybe you’ve said it all, then maybe take five minutes with a timer, just to sit and breathe. And just practice, you know, focusing on the breath, rather than anything else. But I think that especially in the beginning, it’s important to try and get things out before you try and quiet everything because it can feel like pushing, you know,
similar to the breath work model is you’re gonna have to detox one way or another. We’re talking about really functioning at an optimal level of purpose and passion and goodness and love and peace. And those are words you hear about highly realized, accomplished people, not somebody who’s filled with all their own negativity, right. So even if you sit meditation, you’re saying you’re which I couldn’t agree more if you’re going to have to look at this stuff. And you can do some journaling on it. But don’t push it away. And you are encouraging that which is what I say as well, only five minutes just to tell the beginner just sit for five minutes morning and evening would be great to set a timer but get into the habit of doing it. There’s intention matter like you could sit down sit and it’s gonna matter tutorial lacks, how does relaxing, get me to know my purpose, do you set an intention before you might start setting or something?
I love intentions. And I think that if you have one, you’re going to have much better results, obviously, because you know what you’re working towards. But the intention, I wouldn’t necessarily choose relax, I might just choose, you could even say set an intention of I’m going to sit here for five minutes and practice focusing more on my breath than before, right? So maybe your intention is simply to have a certain kind of experience rather than trying to get an outcome. Because we’re very conditioned to want outcomes and everything and want something that we’ve gained from things but you know, the more that you sort of connect with all that is you realize that you know trying to control what we gain is futile. So, in essence, it’s better just to have an intention about the process and then allow it to unfold as it will.
Okay, nice. Allowing because there’s some if we’re agreeing that there’s your purposes right there waiting for you. So yeah, essentially intention just like to relax meditation can always go deeper, but intending to, to know your purpose, right through whatever you’re doing in the process. So another question, people when they talk about purpose, they almost always associate that with their career. It’s like, I don’t like my job. You know, you said you’ve been through careers that weren’t quite right. So you’re looking for your purpose, but is that we use the word dharma. People say I’ve got to find my armor. And they just think like, Well, God, essence whatever you call him that is that going to lead me to a different job? Is that really what we mean by purpose? Just Making money just had a career?
Well, if we’re going to talk about purpose, you know, the capital P and everything that God and all of the beautiful essences have intended, then it’s not necessarily going to be linked with career in that way it could involve your career. But what I would say is, you know, if we think about the fact that if we’re lucky, we live 100 years in this lifetime, right. And then if we are really eternal, then that’s just a blink of an eye in the scheme of things. And so for someone to be focused on trying to make a career turn out a certain way, or have certain outcomes for such a blink of an eye of their experience, it feels like time wasted, almost. Because if you simply exist as something different, you know, it doesn’t even matter what you’re doing in your day. I mean, I always think about the, you know, the kids that passed away, very young people could say that they truly affected them, even though they may be only we’re here for seven years. And so it really is not just about what you do, but it is who you are in this world. And so I believe purpose is more linked to who you are. And then that could allow you to create different career paths for yourself.
So knowing who you are living from that place more being with direct what not just a career move would be, but essentially any choice like I like the translation, that dharma isn’t just like your duty or your purpose, it’s that which is most harmonious and appropriate, right? And if you’re somebody who’s looking for a place of love, and goodness and peace, well, what’s most appropriate for you, right, maybe working in the butcher shop might not quite be most appropriate for you, once you realize, oh, I’m a being of kindness, love and peace. So yeah, Can you just elaborate on the idea that your purpose is not just your career? It’s what’s appropriate in any moment, based on who you are set? What kind of Yeah,
absolutely. And also, for people to really realize just how important who they are is right? That just by them deciding to be themselves, all of a sudden, all of this wave of energy and, and light starts pouring out, because they’re not trying to block themselves off by trying to fit into something. And so the moment that you are not thinking specifically about career, or whatever paths, like the grooves in the road that already exist here, right in the moment that you just try and find your own path, you can immediately start to feel like you’re living your purpose, and you will start to make tons of connections that you wouldn’t have otherwise, right, meeting other people experiencing other things. And so we talked about allowing, it’s almost like allowing the right career path or the right purpose for you to find you by you just finding yourself, right?
Yes, and life just gets so much better, right? When you’re tapped into that when you’re finding that groove. As you move through your blockages. You’re meeting more people, things just start unfolding. Yeah, it seems like life could only get better. So if somebody wants to reach out to you that were interested in private sessions, how would they reach you?
Absolutely. The best way is probably by email. It’s honest way Gray bow@gmail.com. So a and an A Z. Oh, egrabow@gmail.com. I also have my website on a green bow.com. But any of those ways would be great. Great. Awesome. So
your website again,
on a gray bow.com. So a and a gradw.com.
And you pronounce it Anna? Anna? Okay, great. Your website is beautiful. It’s very impressive. I want to just talk to us briefly about the quality went into that. I think the first thing I noticed is like the attention to detail that you made sure that that presentation is awesome. Where does that come from? Why? Why would that be something that’s unfolding through your life’s work?
Yes, absolutely. Well, I think this was something that started back when I was into the arts because I loved dancing. And it was all about sort of presenting myself in a certain way that allowed for people to feel different internally. And I think it’s the same thing with a website or any sort of branding. My mission was always to have my branding, make someone feel something. And because I know that my mission is very linked to love, and peace and light on a very high level. I was very intentional about trying to use colors and things that would help someone feel very peaceful or taken care of when they would see these things.
Yeah, well, Mr. Compliment to How lovely the website is and can just tell like the person behind it is coming from a really good space. So that’s why I was really honored to have you on the show. Then yeah, Thank you for being here. And if you had some closing words of wisdom based on the topic, what would you say to our listeners?
Yes, I would just say that if you feel like it’s time for you to learn more about all of this, trust that voice, and to trust that what you are meant to learn will come to you as well. So the more that you surrender to learning and to allowing, the more answers will come. And they always say that when the student is ready, the teacher appears. And I couldn’t agree more. So allow yourself to let go of anything that does not serve you feel that you are ready for whatever is next and just go for it.
Hmm, beautiful. Yeah. And trust the process, even if it’s difficult, I would imagine because I know for me, my purpose became very clear in my early 20s. But nobody said that was going to be an easy journey to work at fulfill its purpose.
Yes, yes, I feel very blessed that my mentor has always been very transparent about the difficulties of living one’s purpose. And I also feel that, you know, being here in this world, has always been very difficult for me. So now understanding my purpose as one where I bring something to the world has really helped me because if I’m just trying to get something from it, it’s almost impossible to enjoy. But if I feel that, okay, in this world where there is suffering, I’m here to give something, then whenever it is difficult, I know that I can tough it out, because I know that I’m here to give not to receive, and then when it is good, I can just enjoy it that much more. So your purpose can absolutely help you. There will be suffering. But I believe that the benefit outweighs any bit of suffering. There is
any token can go on for hours about this, I was trying to wrap it up. But the the idea of giving is so powerful in this and of course America’s teachers to have give all to all right and prosperity principles, talk about the law of giving and receiving if you want something, give it away. And I just love in wrapping up. The message here really is universal. Like I’ve talked to many people about this over the years, I’m sure you have to now and we all tend to say the same thing. Once we tap into this idea, you’re talking about a different way to find purpose. It’s a very universal message that I believe we’re delivering here today.
I completely agree. And I think that because it is so similar. It’s important that more and more people say it so that people can start to recognize it more clearly. And even more quickly get to this place so they can enjoy it. Yeah,
awesome. Well, we talked about further collaboration. I think we’ll do that right when we get off here. Because yeah, I could see how you could certainly help our students. Like we have our Life Mastery Course. And it starts by saying what is your mission? And it talks about a process to go through but honestly, that’s not always the easiest thing. Well, you know, not always the easiest thing to tap into somebody who specializes in that might be a welcome addition to our team. So yeah, we’ll continue talking. And once again, if people want to reach you just give us your email one more time. Gmail website.
Absolutely. So Ana, Zoey Gray, bow@gmail.com, a and n a ZOEG or a bw@gmail.com or on a gray bow.com.
All right, great. Thank you so much for being here. I look forward to a future collaboration.
Thank you. Me too.